I'm Gonna Do It!

I am clearing my schedule for next week. I am rescheduling appointments, and cramming this week full of too-much-ery so that I will have next to nothing on the slate for next week. Why?

I am going to do it.

I am really going to start...

Potty training the twins.

I am scared out of my mind. I am considering investing in face masks, latex gloves, one of those mechanical grabbers... and someone to replace me for the week...
I have a very sensitive gag reflex, a strong aversion to poop, and a raging desire to take a nap.
This is going to be work. I am just imagining how next week is going to go. Take a journey with me:

I will be sitting on the couch feeding the baby (who has a tendency to eat very slowly) and then something of the potty training variety will happen. I will probably smell it before I see it. It will most likely involve rug, the furniture, or both. There will be crying. (mostly on my part)

I hope they master this skill very quickly. Because I will keep them in diapers. They make diapers that big nowadays. And I am not afraid to use them. I don't mind changing three diapers. I do mind having to use public restrooms... with two other kids in tow...

I really, really, don't want to do this!


  1. DON'T DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! No, seriously, don't.

  2. Wow,good luck with that! I always said that someone could make a million by potty training kids as a business. Millions of moms all around the world would pay a pretty penny for that service! But honestly, who would be insane enough to WANT to do it as a job? NOT ME, that's for sure! One little tip...DO NOT TRY TO WASH OUT POOPY UNDERWEAR! I have no problem with just throwing them away, undies are cheap and SO worth just buying some new ones. Good luck, my thoughts and prayers will be with you.

  3. It is NOT bad. Just keep your patience and you will all have it down before you know it. Just remember they have had three years of using a diaper and no knowledge of anything else so it will be hard for them to wrap thier mind around it at first. If all else fails, send them to my house. I am a potty training professional.

  4. We just bought Carter big boy underwear today. I'll be on the crazy train with you! (Either that or I really am sending him to Tara's! Hee hee!)

  5. I heard of potty boot camp once, try looking it up, maybe there's one here....trust me it would be worth the investment.

  6. Hey Mommy!
    Don't forget that you promised that Gavin could spend the week days with Grandma while you potty train. YOU PROMISED! And Grandma is going to hold you to it!!
    Love, Grandma