Things You Should Not Yell

... with all the windows in your house open.

- How did the baby get a hold of a STAPLER?! 

- I don't care whose turn it is! Just stop FIGHTING over it!

- If you don't cut it out right now, I will give you something to cry about!

- Go away! Mommy is reading her email!

-I'm only going to say this once: if it isn't bleeding, it doesn't need a freaking bandaid!

- You touch that baby ONE MORE TIME- and you're getting the biggest spank I can muster!

- We're not watching any more kids' shows! (the kid asks why) Because I'm sick of watching Max & Ruby, dangit!

- No, I don't know if that basket full of laundry is clean or dirty! Give it a smell and then you'll know!

- Get in that bathroom right now! And you'd better pee this time!

- Quit making that annoying sound, already!


I sure hope the neighbors kept their windows closed during all the rain and cool weather.

I should have probably yelled more things like:

- Oh, you've cleaned up the playroom without asking! How nice!

- Yes, I am making a homemade, nutritious meal for dinner!

- Thank you for eating your vegetables, angel children!

- Of course all the laundry is washed and folded, Husband. Your socks should be in the second drawer to the left.

- Only 18 months old, and solving complex quadratic equations- that's my boy!

- Sure, let's read War & Peace one more time, then it's off to bed!

- Wow! I can't believe you are all filing upstairs for naps without a fuss!

... but then again, I wouldn't want to tell lies.

---UPDATE, because Carina made me feel better.

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